oh, and if anyone wants a turle...

My poor turtle has been somewhat neglected since Simon's arrival, all he needs is to get some each day, have water and either a worm or some fruit or vegetable every day - nothing to hold, to clean except once a month, no training or work to do... and I'm just not doing it. We're a little occupied...

So anyway, if you know anyone that wants a box turtle and tank for zero monies, let us know! He actually is really cool, just not anywhere near as cool as my baby.

Pictures!

Finally, I can add some pictures. Here is our little guy!

Appointment

We had an appointment for Simon today. Despite it being rough to be out of the house for that long, it went well.

We found out he's in the 25th percentile for weight and 100th for height. He looks to be quite tall, just like his daddy. He's 22 1/4 inches long now, and weighs 8 lbs. Still not back to birth weight, but on his way.

I'm struggling a lot with exhaustion, but Bob is being amazing at taking care of me and our little guy. It's a very hard time right now, but most of the time I know that I'm going to make it.

No pictures allowed...

Our internet connection at home is spotty, so we can't post pictures to blogger. Too sad! But I will save them up and if I ever leave again, post some fun ones from somewhere else.

Currently, I'm far too exausted to even think about something like that. I know this gets better eventually, but I'm just barely holding on for now. If Bob weren't here and being as amazing and caring for me as well as he is, I'd never make it.

It doesn't help that because I'm having trouble nursing, but really want to, so I'm trying to make it work, I have all this extra..... stuff... to do each time we try to feed him. It leaves me with an hour - an hour and a half max between each attempt to do everything. Sleep, eat, shower, and so on. I have an appointment with the lactation specialist tomorrow, and hopefully the plan we already came up with with them in the hospital will work. I know babies are fine on formula if it ends up that way, but I'm nearly torturing myself trying to do this now, so I really hope it works.

We may or may not be up for visitors any given day, so call us if you'd like to come by. The only warning I have is that we can't time exactly when he'll need to be fed, so me and the baby may need to disappear for about 30 minutes, then I'll need to be gone for about another hour. But Bob and the boy can be around then.

Oh, and if any one wants to know what they can do to help, prepared food we can just heat up would be much appreciated, and you know, if any one ever feels like coming over to clean up a bit, we wouldn't say no to that either.

My Boys

A couple of my favorite pictures so far

These people really love you

Simon Miller Ham

Welcome son!

Here is Simon, weighing in at 8 lbs, 10 and a half ounces and 21 inches long.

I'm absolutely amazed.

OUCH

Today the worst words in existence are two: false labor.

I spent all night waking up every hour with painful contractions. I've walked around all day, stopping every 12 - 22 minutes with painful contractions. I can't really walk, or talk, or move, I can't make it hurt less, I can't make it stop, but it's not even real labor.

I talked to the doctor today and she said they could just stop, or progress to real labor. It's miserable - and I still have to go through more of it when labor actually starts. Bah.

I realize much much worse could be happening in my life, but for now, this is the most awful thing imaginable.

Dear son

I am glad to see we're making some progress! Sure, 2 cm dilated isn't much, but it's better than 0! I'm glad you're sinking too. Down is a good direction for you right now.

Tomorrow or this weekend would be pretty great timing. Not as good as last weekend or early this week, but that's okay. We just want to see you!

Dear son

I see yesterday wasn't your day. Today could be though. It's going to be pretty hot, but we'll be in the hospital, should you decide to get out now, so it won't really matter. Cherise is still in town, and I promise, you'll like her a lot.

Please?

Dear son

Today would be a good day for you to be born. Cherise is here, and will be tomorrow too, and that's important to me.

It's the 13th, and your dad was born on a 13th also. I'm pretty sure things are at a good place for him at work to leave for a month.

It's supposed to be sunny and warm today, but not too hot. I can't force you into it, but you know, think about it. It would work out pretty well for the rest of us, if that would be okay for you.

Dear son

Get out!

Eeeeeeeeemotional

I haven't had this wild of emotions for some time. I've been fortunate.

Today I am happy, sad, homesick (though for what 'home' I'm not sure), irritable, sad, hopeful, disappointed, happy, irritable, restless, lethargic....

And I'm sure the list will go on.

At least I'm having contractions again. They aren't doing anything, but it makes me feel more productive anyway.

Not yet

I had another doctor appointment today and found out that Simon is not getting ready to come out yet. I am not dilated or effaced at all. Not one bit. I shouldn't be surprised or disappointed, since the original due date for him is the 18th, but I still am.
I want my baby boy!

On the way home from my appointment, I saw a girl around my age with a chicken on the bus. It was in a cage, thankfully, and I sat next to them on the way across the river. The chicken pecked at her phone if she ever let it get close, and I overheard her say that it laid an egg while she was at work today.

Birthdays

Happy Birthday yesterday Cameron, and happy birthday in 9 days Hayden.

Happy Birthday in (I don't know but hopefully very few days) Simon!

All this birthday talk made me realize that this coming year I will have my "golden birthday." I'll be 24 on the 24th.

I've been waiting for this birthday for years. One of the few things I remember about being young is wanting it to be my golden birthday.

And now it will be. January is a ways away, I will have time to think of something that will be: special, 24 related, not expensive, and not time intensive.

Ideas of course are welcome.

I have a question for any readers as well - do you know about golden birthdays? A few people I've mentioned it to didn't know what it was. But wikipedia and hallmark do, so I know it's not just me.

Home

But I still feel normal, as if I would go in to work tomorrow after a long weekend. I doubt I will get used to not working before the baby comes.

Speaking of, I want you now baby! Get out!

Last Day!

Halfway through my last day of work. HOORAY!!!!

It doesn't feel real yet, I'm not sure if it will for awhile. I'm not a wage-earner anymore. Strange.

Also strange: Andy Abad, Callix Crabbe, and Gabe Gross. All on the same minor league baseball team.

(and a warning: I may not be able to post so often now that I won't be sitting in front of a computer connected to high speed internet all day. Our internet is spotty at home.)

Pain and relief

I was in a lot of pain yesterday. I'm pretty sure it all came from my back. My lower back hurt really badly on the right side, and when I moved at all, my lower abdomen hurt too. Of course I thought briefly of labor, but there were no contractions and the pain was constant.

A bath didn't help at all, laying down helped a bit, but what really made a difference was the ice pack Bob brought up to me and squished onto my back.

I could feel all the pain from everywhere leaving as my back got colder, and once it was gone enough, I fell right to sleep.

Amazing. I love ice.